When Grief Meets Love

17 April 2025

“When we lose someone we love, we must learn not to live without them, but to live with the love they left behind.” – Anonymous

“She’s so special in our lives. Having these two years with her is one of the greatest gifts we could ever ask for.”  Claudia wrote in her diary.  Claudia adopted her dog, Chianti, when the dog was 20 years old.  She knew the time they would share would be brief, given Chianti’s age, but she never could have prepared for just how deeply it would affect her life.

For two years, they were inseparable.  Chianti required a lot of care and rather than feeling burdened, Claudia learned what love truly means on a whole new level.  Each day was a gift, and even though the end was expected, saying goodbye was never going to be easy.

When the time came to say goodbye, the sadness was overwhelming.  But instead of staying stuck in the sadness or brushing it aside, Claudia chose to process all her emotions mindfully.  Every day, she found ways to feel her dog’s presence still with her, through all the little things in life, in the quiet moments that spoke of a connection which time couldn’t take away.  She honoured the love that had been and let it guide her through her grief.

Why do I know this story so well?  Because I am Claudia, and Chianti was my 22-year-old pug who passed away 4 months ago.

Grief is a personal and often overwhelming experience.  It’s more than just loss, it’s about carrying forward the love that never fades.  Whether it’s the death of a beloved pet, a family member, a friend or any significant loss, we all know how unbearable the pain can feel.  While the process is often heartbreaking, we know we must go through the stages of grief and through it all, we find ways to keep the connection alive and honour what once was and heal.

Here’s a brief overview of the 5 stages of grief:

1. Denial: The initial shock. "This can’t be real. It can’t be happening."

2. Anger: Feeling angry at the world, at the situation or even at yourself. "Why did this happen?"

3. Bargaining: The “what ifs.” "What if I had done something differently?"

4. Depression: A deep sadness or hopelessness. "I can’t go on without them."

5. Acceptance: Coming to terms with the loss, finding peace and learning how to live with it.

While these stages are often a guide, they aren’t always linear.  You might experience them in a different order or revisit some stages multiple times.  Nobody can tell you how long your grief should take, or what’s right or normal for you.  Grief doesn’t fit neatly into a box and there’s no "correct" timeline for healing.  Instead, it’s a process of healing, of honouring love and of learning to live again.  The key is how you choose to process your grief which can make all the difference.

Sometimes, the weight of grief can feel unbearable and you may need tools to help navigate the emotional waves.  Hypnotherapy is one such tool that can guide you towards healing in a gentle yet powerful way.  It can help you release emotional pain that’s been trapped in your subconscious, reconnect with the love and positive memories shared with your lost loved one, and resolve any lingering guilt or unresolved matters.  It also helps you find acceptance and peace, transforming the energy of grief into a space for healing and growth.

Have I completed my 5 stages of grief?  Well, now that when I have tears, they feel more heartwarming rather than sorrowful.  Winnie the Pooh was spot on when he said, “How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.”

Feel free to share this with anyone who might find it insightful.  Reach out today if you'd like to learn how hypnotherapy can support you through your own journey of grief.